of work!

last thursday, got a sms from city g8.. was pretty excited about it =) got work on friday!

means finally money is coming in ! :)


so off i went for work on friday. from 4pm to 12am supposedly. but things ended early, thank God!!

it was sooooo freaking tiring.

the ironic thing was.. the event i worked at was the Strathclyde Fire & Rescue Annual Dinner.. =.= thinking of how those people wanna kill us for always triggering the fire alarm for nothing.. i serve those ppl nicely on behalf of those who triggered the fire alarm *EHEM* :P

and naive me thought there would be lotsa cute firemen around. cos u know.. everytime they come when there's fire alarm, almost 80% of them are cuteeeee one! trust me. im not exaggerating here. they really are.


but sadly. i see banyak uncle and auntie walking in :( but of the two tables that i was in charged of pouring wine, theres one cute guy! =) so happieee. haha.

practically, my work is to ask "would you like red/white wine sir/madam/miss?"

then start taking plates of food and serve the guests.

then when they're done, clear their dirty plates. *uek* believe me. its better than those in msia seriously. u noe, those fish bones, those chicken bones and skin. here tak ada one. so thankful!

u may think "EH quite easy mar"..

but pls ar. those plates are so freaking heavy and HOT. they got those food ready earlier and throw the whole plate into some oven and taa daa, serve them hot =.=

plus, the dishes that night were one starter, then soup, then another starter, then main course, then dessert! then only tea/coffee. which i didnt do. cos i served the tablets instead :D

before starting work :)

sadly toilet is the only place we can camwhore :(

i like the deco =) star shaped balloons. and candles on the table.

but there were seriously so many things on the table lor wei! why la so ma fan i also tak tau =.=

oh btw. i was not supposed to even take out my phone at all that night. thats why the pics above very the cacated. i couldnt even see what i was taking. i just take out my phone and snap watever i get only :P


came back at almost 11pm that night and then only get to eat my dinner. starved till hands were shaking.

but anyway, after that day.. i never had proper meal till this afternoon :)

samm came over and cooked this with me =)

so thats about it. about me working for the first time as a waitress =.= not very fun. but i would say its a good experience :) AND sadly it was my 2nd day of the "TIME" of the month. made things worse. horrible backache till today.

DDS ar DDS.

nvm. i wanna go watch my 'born rich' now. and play some silly games. and get some sleep tonight..

addiction

you know how you always feel you'll live better with 'something' in your life?

like you cant live without it.. and no matter how you know it is doing so much harm in your life.. still, u stick to the thought that u MUST have it in life or else, u cant live..


think its time to focus on the long term benefit than to keep thinking of how it is helping you to go through each and every single day.. cos at the end of the day, when things accumulate more and more.. all you get is a horrible, painful experience that you cant even imagine..


withdrawal symptoms may suck big time. involves lotsa struggle, lotsa pain and tears, lotsa giving up and falling back in..

(if u dono how horrible withdrawal can be, go google/youtube it!)

but there will be a day of recovery. thats for sure. and when that day comes, you come clean.. and the next thing u know.. you're all good living a brand new life..


ppl make sooo many mistakes in life sometimes. only family will forgive you readily at all times.

beautiful quotes from OTH

“Remember tonight, for it is the beginning of always.
A promise. Like a reward for persisting through life so long alone.
A belief in each other and the possibility of love.
A decision to ignore, simply rise above the pain of the past.
A covenant, which at once binds two souls and yet severs prior ties.
A celebration of the chance taken and the challenge that lies ahead.
For two will always be stronger than one, like a team braced against the tempest civil world.
And love will always be the guiding force in our lives.
For tonight is more formality.
Only an announcement to the world of feelings long held.
Promises made long ago.
In the sacred spaces of our hearts.”

-Lucas Scott

“Every song has a coda, a final movement.
Whether it fades out or crashes away.
Every song ends.
Is there any reason not to enjoy the music?”
-Peyton Sawyer

I wanted you to fight for me!

I wanted you to say there is no one else that you could ever be with and that you would rather be alone than without me.

I wanted the Lucas Scott from the beach that night;

telling the world that he's the one for me.

-Brooke Davis

You told me to fight for you and I did. But you never fought for me.

-Lucas Scott

At this moment there are 6,470,818,671 people in the world.

Some are running scared.

Some are coming home.

Some tell lies to make it through the day.

Others are just not facing the truth.

Some are evil men, at war with good. And some are good, struggling with evil.

Six billion people in the world, six billion souls. And sometimes... all you need is one.

-Peyton Sawyer

Sometimes i wonder if anything's absolute anymore. Is There Still right and wrong?
Good and bad? Truth and lies?
Or is everything negotiable,left to interpretation, grey.
Sometimes we're forced to bend the truth, transform it,
cause we're faced with things that are not of our own making.
And sometimes things simply catch up to us.
-Lucas Scott

Truth is still absolute. Believe that.
Even when that truth is hard and cold, and more painful than you've ever imagined.
And even when truth is more cruel than any lie.
-Lucas Scott

There comes a time when every life goes off course.
In this desperate moment you must choose your direction.
Will you fight to stay on the path while others tell you who you are?
Or will you label yourself?
Will you be honored by your choice?
Or will you embrace your new path?
Each morning you choose to move forward or to simply give up.
-Lucas Scott

-ADDING in some from Grey's which i find very meaningful as well-

:)

I do love you. Don't you see?
You're the love of my life, I can't leave you. But you constantly leave me.
So I'm asking you please end it because I'm in it.
Put me out of my misery.”
-Dr. Derek Shepherd

"The unexpected is what changes our life”

-Meredith Grey

“At some point, you have to make a decision.
Boundaries don’t keep other people out, they fence you in.
Life is messy, that’s how we’re made.
So you can waste your life drawing lines or you can live your life crossing them.
But there are some lines that are way too dangerous to cross.
Here’s what I know.
If you’re willing to throw caution to the wind and take a chance,
the view from the other side… is spectacular.”
-Meredith Grey

5 mins break post

taking a break after facing my intro work for more than 3 hours now..........

so many pages loaded.. so many journals stacked.. so much info.. but i just cant seem to extract much info from the piles of papers! =(

im finally at the final part of intro.. and i was so excited to finish it by this weekend.. :( but now i doubt myself......... realise this is the hardest part.. and im struggling worse than 2 weeks ago.. sigh...........


slightly disappointed now. at some point of time, the feeling of being 'used' tend to come about.. i dont know.. its hurtful at times.. but think i've learnt to be slightly smarter now.. ignore the funny feeling and continue with my work and live my own happy life in this small cozy room by myself :)


=) so yeap. gonna continue a bittttt more on work. and i shall waaaa laaa! watch some comedy and have some silly laughs by myself :)

ARGH. who says sem 7 is free and easy! whooooooooooooooo :(

if u read this..

i hope you're in love ;)


at this age, its so easy to just fall in love.. and then get hurt and then fall out of love.. and then fall all over in love again.. and the cycle goes on and on and on..

its been some time since i have felt the ease to just fall in love and fall out of love.. lol.. or should i say, those are not even love.. not at all..... at least to me? :)


im sure many of us share with our friends about love, relationship and marriage..

and many times, you would see the sparkle in a girl's eyes when she talked about HER guy.. lately it made me smile to see someone like that =) its just really really sweet to see someone in love.. especially someone close to you :)

and by in love, i dont mean those *snap* and its ON that kinda feeling.. its those that people can see she really sees him as her future.. and vice versa..


so if u're reading this, i really hope that you're in love :) cos me is very happy to see people happily in love lately =)


a lot of times, its not about whether the promise is made or not.. its about how one would REALLY never let go no matter what happens. promises are rubbish.. just like how someone told me before that celebrating anniversary is not something wise to do.. to a certain extent, i have to admit that its kinda true..

:) (i dont know how to put the "<" and "3" love over here.. so a smiley will do)

saw this cute image which kinda contradicts with the content of this post..

hehe ;) so cute.. but that fella is a JERK eh? :P

okay. back to my roster! *roar*

max anger!

dono when was the last time that i was so angry like today.


even after all the very heart breaking days i've gone through, i was not as mad as i was today! seriously..

i guess those days i was just SAD and disappointed mainly. this time, its really pure anger and NOTHING ELSE! and u know why.. you'll only be sad and disappointed over people u REALLY care and ANGRY over people who u dont give a damn. this is what i realise now.


a lot of ppl questioned me why do i write things out in this way and why not just confront that person.. i tot of confronting.. and u dont know how much i WANNA confront and SCOLD all i want so that that fella will REALISEEEE how annoying and irritating and tao ren yan she/he is to soooo many people!


but after calming down and some deep thinking, confronting is not a very good solution. in fact, theres no solution to this. all i can do is just dont care and DONT CARE. all this will be over SOON i tell myself. very very soon. and deep down, i know PEOPLE knows.


from all of this, all i can say is.. we'll only realise who are our real friends after some time and who are just plain PAIN IN THE ASS!

"if you dont know how to talk, you should probably just shut up!"

i can be even more harsh. but no.. if that day ever comes, its gonna be a face to face kinda thing i promise.


and for everyone's information, i dont normally scold people or get soooo mad at people. it happened tooooo many times and im losing my patience!


you're soooooooooooooooooooooo freaking annoying! 看你前面，恨你后面！

lack of motivation

was very semangat last week to do my worksss yang berlambak lambak banyak..


the very motivated feel seem to fall gradually after days and right now, this minute, i'm of 0.000001% motivation.......................


its just REAL tiring to have try and try and try to do.. yet the outcome is so minute... spent like 3 hours trying to work on something, and the outcome is like almost nothing.......


its just terribly depressing..

upcoming pharmcare presentation next week. and all i can say is there are lotsa rubbish on my slides.. and i have no idea what and how am i gonna present on that day honestly..

just wanna get it over and done with. but wait. i still have my intro......... =.= life sux..........


whats worse..

after handing in my intro, i have a 50% exam! which i dont rmb much of the lectures that i've attended for that subject =.=

and whats 'better'.. it falls on my BIRTHDAY. and whats EVEN 'better'.. feedback on the same day! =.="


AHHHHHHHHHHHH! i know i can do this! i think i've gone thru worse ! yeapppp. i can!

oh guess what.. after all the bodoh-ness of keep cutting my own finger,

today i BURNT my two fingers instead =.= was just going to taste the potatoes that i was cooking. the sauce and a piece of potato eventually slipped off my spoon and spilled on my fingers............. it was freaking hot but i tot it was nothing... mana tau, later on hsemate saw they were swollen and gave me THAT like-that-also-can-get-swollen?!? look....

swt. swt. swt. i hv to agree how mum always say my hands are like my legs >.<

this is the tree right outside my window =) its one of the few which havent gone botak yet ^^

so pink. so pretty.

zero degrees!

winter's coming and i felt like i didnt really experience autumn enough..

its like i just realised its autumn. then here comes winter =.= i guess i'm always slow in realising things.. as usual..


its getting REAL cold over here. window can be kept close at all time. for a person who loves to live in cold sooo much, last week marks the first time of me turning on the heater..


so much so.. im still in short pants and tank top in my room at times *teeehehehe*

BUT.. i've got myself a PJ two months back i think? and last few days i finally decided to wear it to SLEEP! ;)

got sheeeeeps!

happy wappy girl in her new PJs =)

so happily camwhoring alone in my room in my new PJs.. someone went knocking on my door and asked to head out for a drink in a Jazz bar.. had to take them off after wearing for like what, 10 mins? :(


guess what!

im now in my PJs again! traaa laaa laaa ;) brrrrrr. cold!

bought lotsa crisps, chocs and cookies to suicide prevent myself from getting hypo in the coming chilly daysss.. McCoy's is soooooooooooooooooooo GOOD! better than sensations! better than walkers! better than any other crisps! =)

oh. and i finally watched The Proposal ;)

was too stressed out yesterday that i feel like i really cant do anything anymore.. so i went and grab a tub of Ben & Jerry's.. moved my laptop near to my bed.. wrapped myself in my duvet.. and enjoyed the comedy with my best friend, Ben & Jerry's =)


i personally love this movie quite a lot! out of 10, i would give it an 8!! ;)


as for my title, BBC says it will be 0 degrees later at 6am. mixed feelings of HURRAY and OH-NO............... here comes the days that i'll be wrapping myself into a fat bak zhang!

p/s - i almost chopped off my own thumb just now. when i told samm about it, her first reaction was like "AGAIN?!?!?!?".. LOL. thankfully it kena my nail only this time =)

dont worry mama, the thumb is good. and ying is good ;)